CAMPUS LIFE: I Kept Crushing on Him)

CAMPUS LIFE

I was only 16 when I gained admission into the university. It all happened three years ago, I had just finished my secondary school education and to my utmost amazement, I got my admission message that same year…

    I was so happy that I wouldn’t have to stay at home for a year or more like my older siblings. My parents, siblings and friends were all happy for me and proud of me.

    I came from a family of 4, the only girl and the last born… I was treated like a baby in embryo, though I was not totally happy about it, because I lacked freedom… This got me so frustrated a lot, that I prayed and silently craved for a time I will leave home. And that was the major reason why I filled UNILORIN while registering for UTME and didn’t fill a school close to home, Lagos Nigeria..

    I desperately needed the freedom, and now that I’ve been admitted, my prayers just got answered. Yaaaaay!!!

Everybody in my family started sermons for me to be careful in school, not to flock with bad friends, and most vital part coming especially from my brothers, is to save myself from boys and their drama. “Facing your studies should top your scale of preference now”, said my eldest brother who is a civil engineer, and one person I respect most in my family… I was close to tears at the thought of being away from my family for the first time. “I will really miss everyone, but I will never trade this new and self- found freedom for any family nostalgia feeling”, I thought to myself.

     My mum kept assuring me of her trusts and confidence in me, even all my brothers kept saying the same thing, except for my second brother… He’s regarded as the black sheep of the family, but has a gift of intuition; 97% of his intuitions are usually right… He kept telling me, he has a feeling I might get deceived and change negatively, but in it all, he promised me he would be there for me. “whenever  you’re at a cross road, or between the red and blue sea, do well to reach me”. I will give you the support you need. Alas! I was left alone in my thoughts, I reminiscence about how happy the family has been. The foundation: strong and solid, all thanks to my Dad. I smiled at the thought of my Dad, I have really missed him; very jovial, considerate, confidant, disciplinarian, a man and servant of God… I remembered that faithful day, when we lost him to the cold, ugly hands of death, after a brief illness. Tomorrow clocks 8years since his demise, we all miss him greatly!

    The entire street and church already knew I had been admitted, everyone kept saying a word of prayer for me, and without parting ways with their own quarter of widow’s mite… My mum, a popular nurse in my area and her commitment over the years as per the things of God, made her very popular in church…

      The day to leave for school came, my eldest brother offered to drive me to school with my mum. I had paid for the acceptance fees, and secured an apartment off campus. My mum was not in support of this, but I lied that school accommodation was through ‘long leg’. My mum bought the idea, but she still thought there must be a way out, my eldest brother too were in support of this, but my immediate brother who always got my back supported me on my decision. He was able to convince, calm my mum’s nerves down and make her heart at peace with that decision.

     I got to my apartment in school, my mum helped me unpack while my brother and I went to school to do some registrations and all in preparation for resumption. We got back later in the evening with cooked confectioneries from a good restaurant, we all ate and slept… At about 5:30 the following morning, my mum and brother returned back to Lagos, and that began my undergraduate journey…

      I was admitted into banking and financing department, my dream course. I was the best in my department. I always look forward to going home on every break I had in school. My raw beauty and intelligence brought a lot of people close to me, especially the opposite sex…

    At the end of the first academic session, I was not only the best in my department, but the best in my faculty….

     In my second year, I was getting more popular, and that really got me distracted… There was this guy called Chris I had always had a crushed on since my registration days, an industrial relations student. He was from a rich background, and I never saw him as one for me, because he always acted split and had too many girls around him… So on this fateful day, it was sunny, I’ve been praying I get out of that zone the umpteenth time. Alas! My prayer got answered, a Toyota Camry pulled in front of me. The dark blue eyes from the car said to me “hop in lady”. I wanted to reject, but on glancing another look, I realised my Chris was seating by the wheels. I smiled sheepishly and got into the car. He dropped me by my hostel that day, I thanked him profusely…

    Seeing my crush and seating close to him again, after a very long time, brought back surge of emotions wiring relentlessly through my body frame… I reminiscence on those times I had effortlessly crushed on him, I looked forward to seeing him the next day.

    I kept seeing more of Chris, the more we saw, the closer we became… We became an item on campus. It was like a miracle, most of those girls who usually flocked around him, had stopped. I started to see my chances with him again… We started attending each other’s classes, if either of us wasn’t through for the day, and the other was… At the end of my first semester of the second year, going home became something I got angry about. So I decided to spend 2weeks before going home. When I got home, Chris and I still got in touch we talk for hours every day, especially during the day when my mum must have gone to work… It was during this holiday Chris asked me officially to be his girlfriend, I told him I would think about it. Though I felt like saying yes Instantly, but didn’t want to sound cheap and desperate… Every blessed day, looks like a month at home. When school resumed, I left home immediately, unlike before, I would spend a week or two at home after resumption.

    Chris still kept singing into my ears his undying love for me. How he adored me, my personality, my beauty, my intelligence…

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    On a Sunday afternoon after meals at his place, I said yes to him. Chris was the happiest man that day, or so I thought!

    Chris was never ashamed to introduce me to everyone who cared to know. He was always proud of me, he did a lot of things for me. My first laptop, he bought it, he changed my wardrobe, I started wearing designers too.. Lol!  I never missed classes though, but after lectures, the rest of the day was spent in the arms of my dear lover. I became indifferent to things that, I failed to realise that academic and spiritual life wasn’t burning any more…

    I started going to clubs with Chris, because I didn’t want to lose him… During those club days, Chris coaxed me into taking some alcohol, but I declined, he kept telling me it’s just a shot, it won’t kill you. I obliged and that was all I remembered till the following morning. I was mad, because the Virginity I had been keeping for a long time just left like that, as if it developed wings and flew away… I was agitated, Chris told me how I craved him last night, and he couldn’t resist me. It was not that I lost the virginity that got me annoyed, but my innocence was stripped away from me in my subconscious. I already knew I was still going to lose the virginity anyways: I knew sooner or later, Chris will still beg for it, I was ready to give it to him if it will save my relationship… I was too annoyed to say anything as hot tears streamed down my face…

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   I left Chris’ place in anger… I took my bath after I got to my hostel and cried to stupor. It looked more of rape to me, and keeps my heart racing if Chris was a rapist… Chris called me throughout the week, but I was too mad to speak with him…

    This period gave me the opportunity to have a rethink on my life. I concentrated more on my academic and spiritual values that were falling like naira and dollar exchange rate. After the first week, Chris stopped calling me, and I saw less of him around me. The third week, I started seeing Chris again but this time he was with those cheap girls that rallied around him. I felt like commanding the ground to swallow me. As if that was not enough, he keeps flaunting those girls to my face. He never gave me any attention neither did he seem to remember we were in a relationship. The more I saw Chris, the more my heart bled…

On the fourth week, I couldn’t hold back my pride, I went to his house to beg him. I’d loved him more than enough to let go of him… He was equally annoyed with me, he said I acted like a child… He said he only used those girls to get back at me probably I will come back to my senses… He said he equally loved me, we profess our love for each other again. Chris told me he would love things to get better between us, so he suggested I move in with him. I was not happy with the idea, I begged him to have a change of heart, but he maintained his stand. I had pictured a life without him, but it was too ugly to behold… I didn’t want to lose him, so I consent to his request…

    That was how we started living a couples life in Campus, but whenever my mum wanted to visit me, I move back to my apartment…

    I kept falling in love with Chris over and over again. We made love every day,  and that kept me in bound with Chris like forever.

    It was like a month to exams, I started doing some brush ups on my studies. I didn’t have much time to throw away with Chris. But I started feeling feverish, and that made my catching ups slow down. Chris had got me some malaria drugs, I got better after two days, but it started again. So Chris offered to take me to the nearest hospital for a checkup. The result showed I was 6weeks pregnant. I almost ran mad, what will I tell my mum, my brothers. What will people say if me?

A million question kept crippling in my mind, without answers. I was going maniac, especially when Chris told me to abort the pregnancy… It was as if I was a city under attack by terrorists and a bomb exploded in my territory.

     I kept thinking about it all. Chris and I were still schooling, even if he has the money to take care of me, it still won’t change the fact that we were fricking young. At 19, Chris a father and I a mother at 18?

   “Hell no! It can’t work”. I finally subscribed to an abortion. After a week, I was fine, we decided to start using protections, though that didn’t go well with him, but he agreed.

    Exams came and we faced it like warriors. Results came but my CGPA never remained the same. It had dropped drastically… I went home for the long vac holiday… It was good to be home again… During the period I spent at home, I kept having dreams of Chris and I having sex. I was afraid the first time it happened, but my body kept wanting him during the day. I concluded since, we don’t see regularly again, it was normal for me to have such dreams: hence, I began to look forward to these dreams…

    School resumed again, it was our third year. The flame of passion and love kept increasing. The heat of attraction was indescribable… However, during this year, I noticed Chris started acting funny.

I’ll always be the one to communicate with him first. Any little misunderstanding, he always yells at me. I still make his meals, do his laundries, and still sex-service him at night till cock crows… Anytime we had an argument, he always find solace in drinking to stupor or hanging out with his bitches. One day, I found myself threatening those cheap bitches that flock around him. Chris came back home that day, and almost beat the life out of me. He warned me sternly, that I should never try to meddle into his business.

    I couldn’t believe Chris was gradually becoming a monster, he sometimes even rapes me if I refuse him sex. I couldn’t cope with his excesses, but I still found it difficult to leave him. I started noticing him with one foreign girl (half-caste). I could tell, he was having a hard time getting the attention of the girl. This reminded me of how I started; young, artless and innocent… Hmmmm!

    I kept begging Chris, but I look like a vulture to him and a repulsive odour to his nasal cavity. I was gradually becoming a shadow of myself… I left for my apartment one morning, and Chris never called me again…

   Chris and I parted ways for our internship programs at different location. That was the last I heard of him. I landed at a rehab, because I was extraordinarily depressed, from depression to some incoherent words with the echo of CHRIS.That marked the end of our couple’s life on campus…

      I’m not against relationships as an undergraduate. But relationships that gets you distracted from your studies, from your maker (God), you should let go…

  ~ Relationships that abuses you emotionally, physically, psychologically and morally… Should be cut short.

~Relationships that devalues you, adds no value to your self-worth must be discarded.

      Unhealthy relationships exists everywhere, being a victim is hard work oh…

Why do you think ladies still keep loving up even in an abusive relationship?

Why do a lot of guys end up becoming monsters to their lovers, But are nice towards other people’s girlfriends?

If Peradventure you find yourself in the lady’s shoe (God forbid) but what would you have done?

      Feel free to let us know your views on Campus life, why you’re still single. Why you think people live that act?

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4 thoughts on “CAMPUS LIFE: I Kept Crushing on Him)

  1. You know I used to think our parents were always just problematic, always on your case whenever they find any guy around you or find out you are in a relationship but after been in a few relationships,I realized why. All the problems and heartache that comes with a relationship just ain’t worth it and it gets worse for girls who get easily emotionally attached because let’s face it,out of the two sexes,the females are more faithful so better not to waste your time especially in this generation type of relationships,its all about sex and cheating at what price? Your peace of mind?. I have experienced an heartbreak before and I tell you,it was real terrible so it just ain’t worth it so just take your sweet time and wait for marriage because you’ll never regret it

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